From the Archives: Artist Unknown (Spongebob)-Animated Critic #2

 Originally Released on July 16th, 2015.
Please note: I no longer stand by a lot of the things said or the way I conducted this review. I am reposting it purely for preservation purposes as a part of my history. I was 15 when I wrote this and took inspiration from some dubious creators to say the least. I also kept it in its original state, mistakes and all (including the weird font change I did halfway through for some reason?). Anyway, apologies to anyone reading this. I hope you get some sort of enjoyment, even if it's ironic, from this glimpse at my past. Thank you. 

Show-Spongebob Squarepants

Episode-Artist Unknown 

Air date-September 21st 2001

Season 2

Episode 38b

Yep, another Spongebob episode. This is a positive review though so don't worry. Season 2 is probably my favorite season of the show and this episode is a leading example of why. Its funny, entertaining, and is pretty much Good Neighbors done right. And thats the main reason I wanted to discuss this episode. It shows how to do a Squidward Torture episode right. Another episode I recommend that does this is Culture Shock. Heck there's even a good example of one done right in season 4. The episode Lost Matress. But this review is about the season 2 episode Artist Unknown. So lets begin.  

The episode begins with Squidward in an art class, that he's apparently teaching. He begins to act arrogant saying one day he'll be remembered as the greatest artist alive or something like that. Arrogance. A personality trait about Squidward that has really been forgotting about by the writers in recent years. Arrogance is a trait people tend to hate. Which is why it feels so satisfying and funny whenever Squidward gets tortured or annoyed in the earlier seasons. Arrogance is key to a successful Squidward Squidwars Torture Porn. Which the modern writers have seemed to forget. Instead they think the can hurt him just for being squidward and take it to annoying and uncomfortable levels. You can't just torture him just because you felt like it. You need to give him a reason to be hurt, like make him act arrogant or jerky, then give him what he deserves. That way its funny and enjoyable still. Now as i said previously most forms of comedy involve some form of pain on someones part. They don't always have to deserve it but dont take it to far. For example if squidward wasn't acting so arrogant this episode would have gone to far. So the more you make you character deserve it the higher the limit of what you can do to him and keep things funny is also raised. At least thats how I see it. We'll talk more about this later.

Any way in the middle of Squidwards speech a out how he's gonna become the world most renowned artist a janitor comes in and gives a really funny line(that i will not spoil). The janitor actually has a lot of funny lines. In fact all of his lines are pretty funny. Either way squidward opens the door for his new art class.

To bad for Squidward as none of those fish are looking for an art class. They're looking for cooking. The only person interested in art class is guess who......Spongebob. 

Now lets talk about Spongebob. He annoys squidward quite a bit, but as i said its funny as squidward deserves it and he never does it to be malicious or anything. I mean in Good Neighbors Spongebob didn't do any of his acts of annoyance to be malicious but Spongebob and Patrick were also very annoying to watch as an audience. In this episode Spongebob is actually in character and is not annoying to watch. Anyway Spongebob is honored to have Squidward as a teacher. Squidward begins teaching class under the assumption that spongebob has no art talent but actually he does. He starts of with a circle. His circle is all squigly and not perfectly round at all. Spongebobs on the other hand is perfect on his first try. He did it by drawing a really good human head and eraseing all the details. Its a good joke that i did an awful job at explaining. Squidwards reaction is also pretty amazing. He then goes on to criticize spongebobs work even though it was good as squidward is just a negative nancy about anything spongebob does. Spongebob does some more art in very creative ways(that I tried to do as a kid) but Squidward continues to criticize him. Saying what Spongebob is doing is not art. Squidward the tries to teach spongebob how to make marble statues. When Squidward demonstrates the marble turns into a bunch of rubble. 

Spongebobs attempt however ends with a beautiful statue. Squidward even admits its beahtiful but quickly starts criticizing it (as i said before he is extremely negative about things spongebob does). 

I should also talk about Squidward. None of his actions make him unlikable.

He still deserves the punishment he gets but he still remains likability despite being arrogant. But still its still funny to see him punished. It's......Complicated

He say's Spongebobs statue is awful and is not art and then he sticks a clay version of his nose on the statue. He makes Spongebob feel like a useless artist and he goes to cry in a dump. Yay this moment makes me rethink how likable squidward is in this episode but he does cheer spongebob up(even if it was for his own good). Plus he loses in the end and gets what he deserves so...yay i'm conflicted on this scene. Makeing spongebob cry was kinda jerkish. He does show a brief face of concern but then quickly goes to not giving a crap. 

Either way, an art collecter comes into Squidward's class.

Let me tell you, this guy is funny and he has some really good lines making fun of Squidwards art. Its hilarious. He's hilarious. Wow this episode has 2 really funny characters that will never be seen again. Man, that sucks. The time I spent with them was so short lived. What were their life stories, where did they come from. Questions we'll never have answers to. 

Oh well.

Anyway, all of squidwards art has been mocked by the art collector. He then sees Spongebobs statue and says its a masterpiece. Apparently the only flaw is the nose Squidward added. :P

The art collector wants to put it in his museum and say the person who made it will get Fame, Fortune, and Anything their heart desired. So of course Squidward takes credit. On the way out the door however the head breaks off the statue.

Poor Statue...Man, dude, thing. 

Squidward tells the art collector that by tomorrow he'll have another one ready, but of course he needs spongebob as he didn't actually make the statue. 

So he goes to the dump to find Spongebob and puts him back in his class in the hope that he'll create another MASTERPIECE. 

That doesn't happen as Spongebob starts doing what Squidward taught him. He even does evergthing by a book about art. He thus loses creativity and starts makeing bad art. Remember the circles I mentioned, Spongebob's are now like Squidward, not round and squigly, as Squidward is his inspiration. If this episode was done wrong like Good Neighbors this scene would be a slap in the face, but since this episode was done right it's actually pretty funny. Its funny how the fact that Squidward was being so harsh on Spongebob's art is now biting him in the butt. He gets what he deserves, the punishment is not taken to far and its fun and enjoyable to watch. 

We then get to the scene where Squidward tries to make Spongebob create another awesome marble statue like he did earlier. 

We also get one of the most famous Spongebob scenes. The main reason people remember this episode. 

I gotta date the marble. :D Now that's funny.

*Fake Cough*....Anyway moving on.

But,of course, Spongebob does what Squidward did and turns the marble into Rubble. He even adds the little fake clay Squidward nose. 

This scene is priceless. Squidwards Reaction is priceless. In fact this entire ending has just been really clever, funny, and entertaining. 

Refer to my comments above about how this is a Squidward Torture episode done right. 

Either way Squidward flips out and gives his job to the janitor. Unknowingly he created an excellent piece of art during his freak out (it makes since if you watch the episode.)

He then give all responsibility of the class to the janitor thus giving him credit for the piece of art Squidward made

In a terribly done episode like Good Neighbors it would be a slap in the face but this episode was done right and so it works

In conclusion this episode was funny, cleverly written, fun and entertaining. What more could I ask. It's a Squidward torture episode done right. 

Best Part-Everything after the dump scene.

Worst Part-Squidward making Spongebob cry.

Score-8.5/10

Thank you for reading and next time I'll be covering the best cartoon currently airing, in my opinion, Steven Universe

Next Animated Critic-Too Many Birthdays (Steven Universe)

Other Future Reviews

Driven to Tears (Spongebob)

Peter Problems (Family Guy)

Mysterious Shadow(Cybersix)

Friendship is Magic Part 1 and 2 (My Little Pony)